正文 7 师(第2页/共3页)
那个被炸飞的装甲输送车司机从昏迷中苏醒过来。他小声说话也会震得头疼,只能小声,大声不了。他已经接受过军医院的治疗,他被切开了颅骨,脑袋里像是一锅粥,清除了碎骨渣。用螺钉把右手接起来,但没有骨节。他的第一种感觉是惋惜,惋惜一切都不可挽回了,看不见朋友了,最难过的是自己再也上不了单杠了。
他在几家军医院里躺到差一个月就满三年,进行了二十次手术,有六次是全身麻醉。在居延战地医院实习的大学生们根据他的状况写过文学报告《他有什么,没有什么?》,发表在国内主流杂志上,可惜没什么人看。他自己不能刮脸,实习的大学生们替他刮。第一次刮脸时,学生们不小心把一瓶香水都洒在了他身上,可他还在喊:“再来一瓶!”他闻不到香味,闻不到。他从床头柜里取出了所有东西:熏肠、黄瓜、蜂蜜、糖果,都没有味儿!他看东西有颜色,吃起来有味道,可就是闻不到。他几乎要发疯!春天来了,姹紫嫣红,这些他都看见了,可是闻不到香味。他的头里被取出了2毫升的脑浆,显然把与气味有关的中枢给剔除了。三年过去了,他仍然闻不到花香、烟味、女人香水的味道。如果香水气味又冲又浓,把香水瓶塞在鼻子底下,他倒是能闻出味来的,可能是脑髓中剩余的部分承担了丧失的功能。
这名装甲输送车司机出院以后,领了一笔补助金——8000元,部队有规定:轻伤——10000元,重伤——80000元。以后的日子,得自己看着办,抚恤金没有几个钱,他回国后,只好依靠爹妈养活。他老爹、老妈过着没有战争胜似战争的日子,他的父母头发全白了,都患了高血压、甲亢。
有领导邀请他到国内重点高校去演讲。他反问领导:“讲什么?我不会讲战斗行动。讲我至今还如何害怕黑暗?有什么东西一掉下来,我就会吓得全身发抖?讲怎么抓了俘虏,可是没有一个能押回团部?当兵一年里,我没有见过一个活的居延游击队员,我见到的都是死的。讲收集人的干耳朵?讲战利品?讲炮轰后的村庄?村庄已不像是人住的地方,而像挖得乱七八糟的田地。讲战争是激情燃烧的岁月?难道我们的大学生想听这些事?我记得我们是一边破坏、杀人,一边建设、馈赠礼物,这些行为同时存在,至今我也无法把它们分开。我害怕回忆这些事,我躲避回忆、逃离过去。从居延战场回来的人中,我不知道有谁不喝酒、不吸烟。领导,您千万不要让我讲在居延的兄弟情谊,我不相信这种情谊。打仗时我们能够抱成团,是因为恐惧。我们同样上当受骗,我们同样想活命,同样想回家。在居延,我们能联合起来是因为我们一无所有。我们关心的只有这些问题:足够余生糊口的抚恤金、有电梯的住房、便宜的好药、能看上好医生、进口的假肢、成套的家具……这些问题解决了,我的战友瘫的瘫、痴的痴、死的死,也就差不多了。”
领导尴尬地笑笑说:“我正在写一本反映居延战争正能量的书,您不愿作演讲也没关系,我主要是想听您说说居延的事,搜集写作素材,您继续。”他鼻子皱了皱,像祥林嫂继续道:“等
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