正文 第98章 人心鬼蜮—原是我不配(第1页/共3页)
慕家老夫人的屋里从来没有这样闹腾过。
那个丫鬟在屋子里跑了一会儿,又喊着要杀死老夫人的话。手里不知道从哪弄出来一枚长针,对着老夫人就扎了去。
但屋里这么多人,怎么可能让她得逞,只一个崔妈妈就将她制服了。
老夫人看她杀得眼红,不由得问道:“这么多年了,你为何才要杀我?你曾经有那么多次机会,为什么直到现在才想要杀我?”
老夫人的话让这丫鬟愣了一会儿,就在老夫人以为她不会再说什么时,忽听她道:“因为我也曾经想过放弃,我也曾不忍心过。
十多年了,每一天对我来说都是煎熬。
又想替娘亲报仇,又觉得老夫人并不像我一直以来以为的那样。
时日久了,慢慢的就成了心魔。
近日又快到我娘亲祭日,这心魔一直困扰着我。
我想做个了断。”
她跌坐到地上,抬头看向老夫人,“其实我信你说的话,但是我过不去我自己这一关。
我总想着如果当初我和娘亲能顺利的进入侯府,那我现在应该是嫁得良婿,过着锦衣玉食的生活。我还是现在这位侯爷的庶妹,是家里这些孩子的小姑姑。
可惜没有如果,我一个外室生养的孩子,连庶出二字都当不成。
这侯府的一切我都不配。
罢了,命里如此,是我与这一切没有缘分。
也是我终究没能完成最初的心愿,没能亲手杀了你,替我娘亲报仇。
但是这都不重要了,一切都过去了。”
她哭了起来,低下头,一下一下抽泣。
老夫人也是颇多感慨,看着这个孩子,她是既心疼,又替当初的自己和那个外室不值。
再想想自己夭折的儿子,心里的痛就更加难忍。
崔妈妈看出老太太不对劲,赶紧劝慰:“老夫人,都过去了,别再想那些事了。”
慕长离站了起来,对崔妈妈说:“把兰花院儿所有的烛火都换上一批,之前的被她做过手脚,所以你们才会睡得那么沉。
她以针刺祖母心窝,回头我写个方子给祖母送来。按方抓药,几日便可痊愈。”
说完,她又低头看向那个坐在地上的大丫鬟。
“生死由命,一个人来到这世上,是锦衣玉食还是病痛凄苦,是
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